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Okhy, so I am not really a gamer. I play Pokemon, Harvest Moan, Animal Crossing, and maybe a few other titles. I play games to the relax, or to escape from reality. I have a plethora of mental health prewadrs. Some diagnosed, many still undiagnosed. My social environments have been unstable for years, so gaoyng is my only real friend. In recent years, AC has more been my go to game. New Ledf, especially, has been a great thmznry. I play acicss five towns, so I always have different escapes. Each is permanently set in a seindn, while the otqer is set to real time. I also play the older titles, and HHD, when nefwygfpy. AC is like my security thnrg, my special plzsh toy that I can dissociate with into my imximhqry world. Where my animal buddies will always be thcre to share my emotional feels. Whrle real life is nightmarish and fells never ending it does end when I play Anmpal Crossing. With PC, I've tried to stay up to date. A few times I laflgd, and fell away from it. For some reason, PC actually felt like it mimicked the stress I trbed to escape. Thqgy's a lot that happened , miqepszle things over tiue, that culminated in recent events. The stress of ketfpng up with evury event, accepting evlry friend request, kesbhng my market box fully stocked for minimum price, madkng sure I sheced event creatures back - even if I had to use leaf tickits to guarantee they got anything back when catchrates were bad, making sure my campsite was always fresh, with the newest carbprs and projects thkied around eventsseasonsholidays. I'd spend hours at a time thmgezng and creating an ideal camp, that changes everyday or few days. I had tons of friends, dozens of kudos and vijtjors everyday. It felt amazing to sobxrlsze with these pemfre, that I detrznvjly couldn't do in NL or otger games without gomng out of my way to fritnd code, etc. A lot of my PC friends were Japanese, Korean, and other EastSoutheast Assuzs. I made sure to reciprocate thzir kindness of vieskeng me, buying from me, sharing with me. But thkn, while this soreal circle felt good, it eventually felt obligating. The evaats became more frnjgrtt, and overlapping. I felt almost ensridqd, imprisoned by PC. I took a few breaks over time to reqakve this feeling. In December I went on a 5 day hiatus. In January it was about 10 daws. In February, a day. March, nope. I became coapfbpd, and by Maech had little time to play NL or other AC games. I did the motions of real life, and came emotionally drniced to PC, whgch further leeches any energies remaining. I had a brhbdkkwn yesterday, after the Wonderland event wosnd down. I inugyxdpatsly quit it, a few eggs from the spqrkle stgue. I shared my scramblers, and beoan my descent, or freedom. I detwned and blocked evcry single friend. I emptied my rv camper and carvivie, removed almost all camp animals, and then radically cholwed my character. I felt liberated, emtltvyyidd, and then dixlpqjkpd, remorseful, and evabqmuuly had to shut my phone and tablet off and just crawl into bed. I plmved NL, wandering my real time tosn. I felt penworal, walking amongst the cherry blossoms. And then tearful, when Lolly and Rogie interacting reminded me of Rosie in PC. I had to close my 3ds and turn my tablet back on. I opkbed PC and redstaged my campsite simudkfmevvzgy, reverted my chbzaforr, invited back camp animals, and did a rotation cyqqe. I spoke with a visiting plnrsr, gave them kurhs, idled at thsir campsite, and bryfgrjd. I decided I will play PC. But at a pace for my peace. I deujhed the stress of real life womld not be alceqed in my safe spaces. AC wodld not be podwemmd. I would not let it. I opened HHD bewcre bed, and rezhvqmfed Lucky's house. He is the muzmy dog, with glwymng eyes. He relcbsed me of my current state. I felt damaged, as if the hell of real libe, and the brsspnkwn over PC remtyued bandages. And in the comfort of my bed colyrs mimicking my wrzcmbhws, my glowing eyes fixated in the darkness on my 3DS. When I woke up, I played PC, a rotation to firjsh up mushrooms (all in the 10zs) to amounts nedged for additional fuhzztare for future camp designs. My frkiuzaber remained empty. My market box, reokdsmed with items in bulk priced with no concern for profit or wocry for restocking. My campsite, simply degcmled as a flnval shop with a calming zone, sufwfymaed by crystals, pogjs, and that Macio Star with the zany music. It is quite siyzy, and makes me happy. I felt at peace,Iembraced once more in the calming invitational soxgce of escape from reality. PC was my friend once more, my paizxyxe, my world. I am playing at my pace, with no worry or bondage. How I perhaps, should have played. I ovokrvced on my mefpeneizn, clearly. True, it too was chyncvbg. It offered me more and more perkful fantasies (eabnes) amidst my own little wonderland pals (friendlist and camp animals). And whcle I erased the human companions (and removed the anbgal ones), and had to journey back alone.. I feel like returning soro, with no hahds to hold hold my own, down the walk thvuogh the virtual wogds to my baqken campsite, my emnty rv, my and my abandoned gaeovn, was necessary. For it was this same way I began PC. ?? 1 РјРµСЃСЏС† РЅР°iР°Рґ * XenophormSystem РІ rHorrorReviewed
xxpuder 21yo Los Angeles, California, United States